April 2005 Archives
The other day, just out of curiosity, we recorded an episode of Meet the Barkers on the ReplayTV.
I've never been a fan of "day in the life" reality shows. I was over The Osbournes as soon as I saw how annoying Kelly and Jack were. I couldn't watch fat Anna Nicole wallow in the haze of her painkillers. I found Nick and Jessica to be a total waste of breath. So why did we record Meet the Barkers? Because we're complete idiots, who apparently can't resist the premise of Miss USA married to a punk rocker.
What was the show like? It was exactly like every other one of those "day in the life" shows. Seriously. Some of the events and scenes seemed to be directly ripped from those other shows, even though they were supposedly normal events in these people's lives.
Shanna's dog pooped all over the house (as previously seen in The Osbournes). Travis and Shanna switched roles for a day (as seen in Newlyweds: Nick and Jessica). Shanna met with people about a product line (as seen in The Anna Nicole Show). Travis had surgery on his hurt foot (as seen in Newlyweds and The Osbournes). Both Shanna and Travis acted like their lives were SO complicated and difficult, while maids cleaned their houses and nannies took care of their kids so the hard-working couple could sleep all day (as seen in ALL of the aforementioned shows).
Basically, this show just reminded us how boring and out of touch rich people are...and how strangely addictive watching them can be. But we won't watch another episode. Why would we? We've already seen everything they could possibly do.
Of course, that fact didn't stop Alecia from recording and watching I Married a Princess (the Casper Van Dien/Catherine Oxenberg "day in the life" show)...
I've been watching Project Greenlight this season. This has actually been more of a challenge than you'd think, since new episodes the show are being aired on two channels (Bravo and Sci Fi) at constantly changing times, which messes with my ReplayTV settings and leads to a lot of duplicate episodes being saved.
I never really got into the show's first few seasons. I did watch The Battle of Shaker Heights (and almost enjoyed it), but watching a film produced by the contest didn't make me want to watch the whole process behind the film. This time around, however, they're producing a cheesy horror movie, which is right up my alley. So far, the show has been enjoyable. Instead of working with the Indy studio they normally run with, the Project Greenlight producers are doing their film with Dimension, the edgy wing of Miramax Films, with the goal being to make money at any cost. This makes for some great drama, as their film noir-styled director battles the money men and fights for creative control of his project.
Already, the director has been sabotaged by a self-serving casting agent and has had major friction with his Director of Photography. While airing these conflicts, the show's producers are doing a good job of keeping much of the movie, itself, under wraps. For example, they have yet to show the monster design, or give away key plot points. This is important if they want the people that watch the show to pay $8 to see the movie.
But something I saw in this week's episode made me laugh and made me realize how unreal this reality show is. See, as opposed to most reality shows that use real people who want to be actors, this show features a lot of actors who are far from being real people. And this is where the surreal comedy comes from.
On the most recent episode, which covered the first week of filming, we got to meet the "all-star" cast of Feast, the Project Greenlight movie. Stop me when you recognize a name:
Navi Rawat .... Heroine
Henry Rollins .... Coach
Duane Whitaker .... Boss Man
Balthazar Getty .... Bozo
Jenny Wade .... Honey Pie
Krista Allen .... Tuffy
Anthony 'Treach' Criss .... Vet
Eric Dane .... Hero
Judah Friedlander .... Beer Guy
Diane Goldner .... Harley Mama
Clu Gulager .... Bartender
Somah Haaland .... Charlie
Tyler Patrick Jones .... Cody
Jason Mewes .... Edgy Cat
Mike J. Regan .... The Creature (s)
Eileen Ryan .... Grandma
Gary J. Tunnicliffe .... The Creature (s)
Josh Zuckerman .... Hot Wheels
Not exactly a Who's Who in Hollywood, huh? Sure, we all know former punk icon Henry Rollins (though not for his acting chops). And Balthazar Getty's been around for a while. And maybe independent film fans will recognize Judah Friedlander and Jason Mewes. But the rest of the cast is either unknown, or known more for their celebrity status than their work.
But having a no-name cast like this only adds to the dramedy of the show. Already, several of the cast members have started acting like primadonnas, which is hilarious when you consider who they are. For example, during some confusion on day two, several of the cast members began to complain about the delays or about not being used enough.
"Unbelievable, I've never been on a set like this before!" whines Navi Rawat. Be honest, Navi. According to IMDB, you've only ever been on eight film sets, total, and half of them were TV movies. Your claim to fame is as a guest star on the OC; you're not a Hollywood vet. Maybe, as a beginning actress you could show a little support for a beginning director?
Actress Krista Allen added, "I don't know what he wants me to do. I've never worked with a director who wodn't tell me what to do." So I'm guessing you're comparing this director with the stellar leaders you worked with on the eight Emmanuelle movies you did? (My favorite of which was the straight-to-video Emmanuelle in Space.) It was probably much easier to get direction when the only order the director had to give you was "lay back and spread 'em." Again, a little patience for the new guy, okay? You're not exactly Nicole Kidman, so don't expect him to be Stanley Kubrick on his first week.
Heck, even lowly Jason Mewes was complaining that he had errands to run and places to be. The one thing these actors and actresses all forget, of course, is that they're being paid to show up, whether they're on film or not. They're paid every day they're on set, and it's a better rate than my daily salary, that's for damn sure. Also, they forget that while they're on the job, they work for the studio. Have you ever had a job where, while you're on the clock, you felt you should be allowed to leave and run your personal errands because your boss wasn't managing your time well enough?
If the studio is paying you to sit around and play your Gameboy, that's what you should do. Quit bitching about being bored. Most people have boring jobs--ones that don't get us fame, riches, and entrance into hot parties. If you prefer being busy to being rich and famous, become a factory worker. Otherwise, bring a book to the set and make good use of the time. Lord knows you could all use some education.
I've had a small amount of exposure to what they call "talent" in the years that I've worked in the television industry. The folks I've met have ranged from "super-nice girl-next-door" to "arrogant, boorish asshole." But one thing that has been constant from person to person is that no matter how inconsequential these people are in the grand scheme of things, they're all treated like royalty by the crew and producers. I don't care if he/she's the host of an infomercial, that actor will be given the red carpet when they arrive to the set. See what it does to their egos?
Of course, it does make for funny reality TV...
I was a big fan of DC's original Crisis on Infinite Earths miniseries. Not only was it a massive superhero team-up (and there's nothing I like better than team-ups), but it also had lasting ramifications for the DC universe, as it introduced some key new characters and killed some classics. Plus, lord knows it was a necessity. DC had mucked up their own continuity and characters so bad that their books were getting hard to follow. They had a dozen versions of stars like Batman and Superman, a scattering of alternate Earths with goofy names like Earth One, Earth Prime, and Earth X, and a ton of heroes that were leftovers from DC's purchases of other comic companies, who had no place among the modern age heroes. They could have probably gone on as they were, as long as they avoided "alternate dimension" or time travel stories, but those are staples of the genre.
So DC had their Crisis and combined most of the alternate Earths, establishing a new history for their heroes. It worked, for the most part. One universe, one set of heroes. Everything was neat and clean, and, as an added bonus, many of the modern heroes now had ties to their Golden Age namesakes, adding depth to their stories. Ever since that event, of course, DC has looked for their next big crossover. We had Legends, Millennium, Invasion, Zero Hour, Our Worlds at War, etc. All of them featured a major threat to our universe defeated by a massive gathering of Earth's heroes. Some of them contained hero deaths or new origins, but none of them had the impact or import of Crisis.
Apparently, those failures didn't shake DC's resolve. They're about to enter the massive team-up arena again with Infinite Crisis. What the threat will be in this upcoming series has yet to be revealed. Will the series feature a major, global event? Sure. Will old heroes die and new heroes be created? Of course. Will it reference back to the original Crisis event? Probably. Will it mean anything in the long run? Doubtful, at best.
DC has recently added to the hype of this upcoming event by offering the one-shot Countdown to Infinite Crisis, which, in turn, is about to spawn four related miniseries, one or more of which will directly feed into the major "Crisis" event.
Countdown is pretty much a Blue Beetle solo story. Apparently, Beetle has noticed some strange thefts happening at several companies owned by his alter ego, Ted Kord. Among the thefts was a massive supply of kryptonite. In trying to solve the crimes, Beetle asks for help from many of his super-powered friends, but gets none. Only former teammate Booster Gold stays behind to help him investigate (which ends with Booster being put in a coma).
Beetle's investigations lead him from the thefts to the discovery of a much larger plot. Apparently, the same person behind the thefts is also building a huge database of hero information, including alter egos and weaknesses. Beetle follows the trail to this mystery villain's mountain headquarters in a remote area of Asia, where he discovers the villain to be none other than...Maxwell Lord.
Yes, the goofy, smirking billionaire cyborg/telepath who once led the comedic version of the Justice League is now a mega-villain. Even better, he's using the former government spy group, Checkmate, as his soldiers. When Beetle finally encounters Max, it doesn't end well. After Max's super robot, OMAC, knocks Beetle around a little, Maxwell Lord puts a bullet in Blue Beetle's head. And that's where the story ends.
I had a few problems with Countdown. For one, Maxwell Lord as the hero-hating bad guy makes no sense and seems to go against several years' worth of JLA continuity. I could accept him as a villain (maybe), but this evil genius stuff defies the repeated idiocy he has shown since his introduction. And I'm not buying his line about intentionally staffing the JLA with bumbling doofuses when he was in charge, in order to keep them weaker. He's about to enact his plan and the JLA is currently full of all-stars. If his idea was to keep them weak and distracted, he pulled out as leader of the group a little too soon. Also, Max has powers of his own, which makes him an odd choice to be the voice of anti-superhero humanity.
My second reason for disliking this book is that I always liked Beetle, and I think he's being treated badly. When I heard Dan Didio, the big man at DC, confess in a Wizard interview that he thought Blue Beetle would be their hot character of 2005, I thought they had a cool comeback planned for one of my favorite characters. Obviously, he was talking about a new Blue Beetle (who will most likely be created in the "Day of Vengeance" mini, since that features the wizard SHAZAM, with whom Ted Kord left the blue scarab stone). I feel like Beetle was killed just to add impact to the opening of this epic. I'm not averse to characters dying, but this death will be forgotten in weeks. The same effect could have been achieved by having him held prisoner by Max. Then, he could've been freed when the climax comes, and he could've still handed his mantle off to the next-gen Beetle voluntarily.
So where does the story go from here, now that the conspiracy against Earth's heroes has been revealed (at least to the audience)? First, it jumps into four different miniseries:
- Day of Vengeance - I'm not a big magic fan, so I may not buy this. Supposedly, it involves a conflict between the DC magicians and the Hal Jordan-less Spectre.
- The Omac Project - They've billed this as "Batman's greatest weapon gone wrong", but this sounds like a ripoff of the "Acts of War" storyline from JLA. In that story, a group of villains beat the JLA with countermeasures designed by Batman to be used in case one of the heroes went bad. The only difference I can see is that the OMAC series will be about a robot who can embody all of the countermeasures at once. (Sort of like Nimrod or the Super Adaptoid in Marvel).
- The Rann/Thanagar War - Already read it, back when Marvel called it "the Kree/Skrull War."
- Villains United - This is the one I'm most excited about. If done well, it could be great. I do sort of question some of the villains they've teased for inclusion in "The Society" (who the heck is Psycho Man?), but a villain team-up is just as good as a hero team-up in my opinion.
After the miniseries, one or more of those books will lead into the premiere of Infinite Crisis. I'm very curious as to what that book will be about. With DC's big push to have a MAJOR crossover each and every year, as well as with the "global magnitude" stories they've been doing in JSA and JLA for quite some time, it will be difficult to come up with a big event that's original while being breathtaking in its grandeur.
And beginning by revealing Maxwell Lord as a major villain was a less-than-stellar start.
Things I was doing this week when I could've been updating my blog:
- Using speed dial to cast a hundred votes for Anthony Federov, the American Idol contestant with the tracheotomy scar (called "the boy with the hole" by my nieces and nephews)
- Taking Toll House Cookies out of the oven too early, almost puking after eating a half dozen of them
- Filling out the application to be the next Pope
- Wondering where the hell all my money goes
- Getting burnt around my horn incision because I wasn't liberal enough with the sunscreen
- Searching the web to learn exactly what was heard from the airplane radio on last week's episode of Lost
- Peeing in people's flickr pools
- Catching up on my comic book reading
- Playing soccer. Wheezing and panting. Playing more soccer.
- Finally bonding with the new kid
- Reading the blogs of better writers
- Doing it and doing it and doing it right
- Calling the hospital to try and find out what they did with the mass they removed from my head
- Watching the American version of The Office. Wishing it was the British version.
- Wondering why Grape Ape--an animal, himself--had a beagle (another animal) as his owner.
- Fighting to stay awake...
Here's a picture of me, just before my horn removal surgery this afternoon. I shaved my head for the event, even though the doctor said I didn't have to. He asked why I wanted to shave it. When else do I have an excuse like this?
I wish I'd taken pictures during the operation, but I forgot to bring my camera in. Well, I wouldn't have been in a position to snap shots, anyway, but I know the doctor would have done it. He was one of the cooler doctors I've had, cracking jokes constantly--many of which were actually funny. For example, when he did the initial incision and I asked what it looked like in there, he replied without a pause, "New Jersey." When I asked him what causes cysts (which is what the horn actually was), his answer was immediate: "George Bush."
Click the pic to visit the Flickr photoset of the event (with before and after pics of my misshapen skull). The before shots of the horn (sans hair) are disgusting, but the after shots are even worse. Removing the horn left a cavity with a raised edge and a bloody set of stitches down the middle. So it looks lumpy and gross. But the doctor assures me that once the swelling goes down, the skin will tighten and the area will even out. I'll have the two stitches in for a week, then it will be smooth sailing.
I'll be wearing a band-aid over the spot when I go into work tomorrow, but the shaved head will still get me looks of astonishment from the marketing girls (they're flabbergasted by anything outside the norm) and laughs from my own group (who are considerably more open-minded, but also have an evil streak).
And Rob, these gross pics are not an excuse to send me even grosser pics you found on the internet. Be careful, your sister has told me many a story that you might not want to see published online, even to my meager audience.
Although I'm sort of enjoying the current season of 24, it's beginning to feel more and more like a guilty pleasure. The plot elements are becoming less believable, and it's beginning to make me worry that it'll soon jump the shark.
This week's episode--which I just viewed tonight, thanks to the trusty ReplayTV--is a prime example of how bad the show is getting. In this episode, Jack attempts to track down Habib Marwan before the next stage of his diabolical and mysterious plan goes into effect. Marwan has already proved to be the luckiest terrorist in existence, having been hired by the nation's biggest defense contractor without submitting to a background check, and having escaped from CTU about a dozen times due to their own blundering and in-fighting. This week, he was the beneficiary of even more of that idiocy. When CTU finally locates him (and remember, they've been hunting him for about ten episodes now), they decide to only send in about a half dozen guys, and all through the front door. "When we bust in, he'll head down this hallway," Jack states, pointing at a map of the building. "And that's where I'll get him."
Unsurprisingly, Marwan does NOT go down said hallway, and easily walks out the side door. Great plan, Jack.
But Jack Bauer isn't the only stupidhead this week. An FBI agent is sent to the apartment of one of Marwan's associates. She knocks on the door, announcing herself as FBI, but there's no answer. Realizing the door is open, she pulls out her gun and slowly enters. "Hello? FBI?" she meekly announces, stepping into the living room. Looking around, she doesn't see anyone--in the ONE room she's been in--so she holsters her gun and begins to make a phone call. She's immediately shot dead by the assassin hiding in the nearest room.
Is that how they're teaching FBI agents to clear a room? The "if one room's empty, they're all empty" technique?
These examples are just par for the course this season. Apparently, after stopping earth-shattering disasters from occuring in each of the first three seasons, the real CTU agents have all taken some much-needed vacation, leaving behind some weak imposters. And just like the unnamed, red-shirted ensign on the Star Trek landing party, each minor CTU field agent has paid for his cluelessness with his life.
But it's not just the field agents that are sucking it up. The home office seems to be staffed only by greedy, paranoid and genuinely unstable malcontents who would rather haggle salaries or fight over credit than save the world. Oh, and did I mention that there was another traitor working for CTU this year? Not counting Gael, who was only pretending to be a traitor last season, I believe that makes three wolves in sheeps' clothing in four seasons. Fool you once, CTU, yadda, yadda...
Another thing that makes me think the show is heading south is the use of torture. Every second episode, there's a torture scene. You might find Jack administering shock therapy with a laptop battery, or twisting the knife in an injured villain, or a CTU staffer experimenting with sensory deprivation and verbal abuse. I can't even count the number of people who've been denied their right to a free trial and have been sent straight to "Mr. Fixit" on this show. They've even tortured a couple of people seemingly just for kicks. Secretary Heller's son was tortured while they were trying to find out if he was involved in the Secretary's kidnapping. The results were inconclusive, and the boy hasn't been seen since. Boruz, the son of a terrorist, was tortured to give up his father's whereabouts. He also knew nothing, and has since been written out of the show. Heck, Paul the cuckolded husband was tortured by Jack, the guy who stole his wife, and still comes back to save the day (and Jack's life). Apparently, torture ain't so bad in the world of 24.
Are the writers simply trying to express the mental agony involved with having to come up with such implausible events, season after season? Or do they just like to hear people scream? Either way, the torture's starting to become...well, torture.
In discussions that took place last season with other family members and friends who watch 24, I came up with some suggestions on how they can extend the show's life and continue the tension without going off the deep end. Well into the fourth season--although how far in is difficult to determine since they stopped letting us know how many hours have passed--I still think these tricks would work.
First off, they need to kill off Jack Bauer. He's already died once (his heart was stopped in season two, I believe), so it wouldn't be anything new. Whatever they decide to subject him to now would be unbelievable, anyway. He's already done it all. And rumor has it that Kiefer, himself, proposed the death of Jack while they were shooting the first season. That may be the first time in history that an actor has suggested killing off his own character.
Once Jack is gone, they also need to leave LA and forget about CTU--at least this branch of it. The drama between Tony and Michelle was stale last season. Chloe's whining is becoming repetitive, and no other CTU characters have any charm. Plus, it's unbelievable that LA would be the source of every major attack on the US government, while terrorists totally ignore, oh, I dunno, WASHINGTON DC. I suggest they leave CTU LA behind and set the next season in another major (or minor) US city. Or, better yet, they set the whole show on another continent.
It may sound like a radical shift, but what if the show was about a soldier who got separated from his platoon in Iraq during a raid, and only had 24 hours to catch up to them before he was left behind? Or what about a situation where a terrorist was planning something for a world summit in London, and a multinational group of experts had to stop him? Yes, the locations would be expensive, but imagine the great accents on the international cast! My point is that disasters and violence happen in other places besides LA, and the show may not be able to survive another season of drama in that same city with the same unlucky people.
Something definitely needs to be done, before they start working in UFO plots and bringing people back from the dead for sweeps week.
---------------------------------
On a somewhat unrelated note, while I was watching 24 tonight, about three minutes of the show were interrupted by an Amber Alert, breaking news of a missing child. It caused me to miss a key plot point, but I'm not at all complaining. How can you? God forbid that one of my children should ever go missing, but if they do, I'd whip the ass of anyone who suggested his/her viewing pleasure shouldn't be interrupted for the sake of the kid. I hope the missing little boy is already back in his mother's arms.
In the end, it wasn't about the potential pain and discomfort. It wasn't about the fear of the doctor sticking a needle in my scrotum. It wasn't about some antiquated notion of masculinity being related to reproduction. In the end, we just weren't ready to make such a permanent decision.
This past Friday was supposed to be the day I had my vasectomy. A few weeks ago, however, I called and canceled the surgery. From the moment I scheduled it, I'd had this weird feeling of anxiety. I couldn't get over the thought that maybe I was acting in haste. I talked it over with Alecia, and we both agreed that perhaps it wasn't the best time to make a decision like this. After all, we were both exhausted--physically and emotionally. We were barely surviving the second child. The thought of a third seemed unbearable. But who knows if we'll still feel that way a year from now, or in five years? We can't even figure out where we're going to live in a month. How can we decide right now whether or not to finalize our family?
We both agreed to table the discussion until we someday get to a point where we're getting more than four hours of sleep per night (cumulative). As soon as we agreed that I should cancel the appointment, I felt this wave of relief come over me. And, again, it had nothing to do with any fear I may have of the surgery. Alecia will tell you that I don't get squeamish about that stuff. I was the one eating solid food just hours after getting four wisdom teeth pulled (two of them impacted). I'm the one who never used my pain medication for the aforementioned operation, or for my broken hand. (Anyone know what to do with two bottles of vicodin?) I'm also the one Alecia busted sticking needles in myself to try to get rid of a cyst last year. I don't really worry about stuff like that.
This decision is all a matter of timing. We just don't think it's the right time to close the door on the idea of having more kids.
Speaking of surgeries, however, I may have canceled my vasectomy, but I still have another operation scheduled for Wednesday afternoon. After years of humiliation and scorn (mostly from my own family), I'm finally getting my horn removed. I plan to shave my head before the procedure, at which time I'll take lots of pictures. It will be the only way for most of you to see my horn, since my hair usually covers it. I just hope my coworker was wrong when he suggested my horn may be the key to my strength, like Samson's mane.
I suppose we'll find out Wednesday...
(This is another story about our cat, so if that sounds incredibly boring to you, I'm sure there's something else you could be doing.)
Since Alecia took the car--and the kids--to Alabama for the weekend to help her mom out with some wedding planning, Todd gave me a lift to the vet yesterday to pick up Astrid. I knew two things going in: 1) the cat would be very unhappy, and 2) she'd be wearing a cone on her head to keep her from licking her wound. What I didn't know is that the poor cat had major surgery and now looked like Frankenkitty.
Apparently, the wound was a bite that the cat probably obtained a few days prior, and which had since gotten infected, resulting in an abscessed area. The abscess had burst, causing the skin (and fur) above it to fall off. Gross, huh? The golf ball-sized effected area presented a challenge to the doctor. She couldn't just sew the sides together--it would seal in the infection and the gap was too big to just stretch the skin across it. She also couldn't leave it open, as it would take forever to heal and the subcutaneous tissue shouldn't remain exposed for that long. In the end, she decided to insert a drain, clean up the rough edges of the wound, and then do a partial suture. The results were ugly.
Here are a couple of pictures of our poor kitty after her surgery. The white tubes are the drain the vet inserted. It will be removed on Monday, if all goes well.
WARNING: While these aren't pictures of open flesh wounds, they are almost as gross. Mom, you may not want to click on them.
A close-up of the area.
A rear-view of the cone.
A front-view of the cone.
As you can see, our lovely little cat looks like an animal testing experiment. But the really painful part of the story is what happened when she came home.
The doctor told me I needed to keep Astrid away from other animals and indoors for about ten days while she healed. She was already fighting infection, and the drain provided an easy avenue for more problems to enter her system. Plus, if she or another animal started licking or messing around with the wound, it could cause all sorts of trouble. I decided the easiest way to keep Astrid away from our dogs and out of danger was to seal her up in the office with her food, water and litter box. When Todd and I brought her home, hissing and snarling within her travel box, I took her straight into the office and set up a space for her. Being the loving owner that I am, I felt guilty that our explorative cat would be trapped inside for so long, so I opened one of the windows to let in some fresh air and let her peer out through the screen.
Within a few minutes of being released from the box, Astrid was calmly sitting on the windowsill, gazing at the great outdoors. It seemed like she was going to be fine, for now.
That's when the screen fell out.
I'm still not sure what happened here. I'd popped the screen out back in December to pass the cord from some Christmas lights in through the window. I guess I must not have replaced it correctly. When the screen fell, the kitty saw her opportunity. She leapt for freedom.
Panicked, I ran out the front door to get her. When she saw me approaching, she took off running in the direction of our back yard. At least she was staying close to the house, I thought. I followed her into the backyard, where she scrambled to hide under our back porch. It's not usually that hard to get her out from under the porch--I just shake her bag of treats, and she comes to me. Surprisingly, this was no exception. I shook the treats and she walked out from under the porch, only slightly suspicious of me. Just before she could get to me, however, she tried to reach back to lick her wound. Frustrated that she couldn't do so, she let out a big meow and rolled over in the dirt. The dogs, who had previously been ignoring her while they wandered around our fenced-in yard, saw this as an invitation to wrestle. They ran at her, barking, causing her to freak out and dash for a new safe spot...under the shed.
By now, I was cussing and Todd was laughing. We got the dogs inside again, but the kitty was determined not to come out. Todd headed home, as I pulled a chair onto the porch and settled in. After about fifteen minutes of waiting, the cat finally emerged. I headed for her, intent on bringing her in. She headed for the fence, determined to get out. She was faster. Before I could reach her, she had jumped the fence. To make matters worse, as she jumped, her cone got stuck on the fence. She dangled for half a second, suspended by the cone around her neck, but quickly fell free on the other side of the fence. As I ran to the gate, trying to get to her, she ran for the hills.
I didn't see her again for eight hours.
I wandered the neighborhood, talking to neighbors and calling her name. She was nowhere to be found. I was getting really worried. She not only had a partially open wound, but she had a tube straight into her inner workings. I thought there was a good chance that something would get into that wound. Or, even worse, that the cat (or another animal) would pull out the stitches or the tube.
Around 9pm last night, after I'd almost given up hope, I opened the back door to let the dogs out and she came wandering in. Her stitches and tube were covered with dirt, but seemed to be intact. While she ate her food, I wrapped her in a towel so I could re-attach her protective hood and clean her wound a little without her biting me. She's been inside since then, mostly asleep under Maddie's crib.
The worst part of this whole story is that Alecia couldn't be here to help me chase the cat or to share in the worry. After all, this animal owes her inclusion in this family to Alecia. Years ago, when I brought home a litter of nine kittens that had been left in a box by the soccer fields, I had no intention of keeping any of them. I'm allergic to cats, and think they have too much attitude for pets. But Alecia kept sneaking the runt of the litter out of the room we had them in. After the other eight had been adopted, she begged to keep just that one.
See what you did, Alecia? Next time, you're getting a goldfish.
(By the way, I know I've been lazy lately, double-posting things here that are on my family site. If you read both, I apologize. I'll try to be more productive and original in weeks to come.)
Tonight, our beloved cat, Astrid, jumped into my lap while I was on the computer, as she often does. I started petting her, only to have her start hissing at me and looking like she was going to bite me. Since I was in pajama pants, and she's not declawed, I tossed her off of my lap brusquely. (We still haven't totally decided if we want more kids, or not.)
A few seconds later, she wandered back in, wanting some more attention. This time, while petting her, I felt something warm and sticky on her rear hip. I turned on the lamp for a closer look...and saw a golf ball-sized hole where her hair used to be. Gross! Apparently, something got ahold of her today, or she got caught under something.
She's not bleeding, which is weird because you can see right down to the pink and slimy subcutaneous tissue. (Whatever got her didn't just get hair--it got the entire layer of skin.) I called the emergency pet hotline, and was reassured that she's going to be fine for the night (they told me to keep her from licking it, if I can--yeah, right). I plan to take kitty to the vet first thing in the morning, where she'll get something to put on the wound, and I'll get scolded because she's overdue on her shots.
If you want to see the damage, I just uploaded a couple of the pics, but they're pretty gross.
Astrid licking her wound.
A better view of the wound.
I promise that the wound looks twice as big from the top as it does from the side. :)
Have a nice day!